This week has got us all nostalgic about our days at big school.
Not only have the headlines been filled with Freshers’ Week shenanigans, but we’ve seen the return of the classic game ‘I-Spy a Child Celebrity at My University’. Students in Birmingham have been losing their figurative faeces from seeing Game of Thrones’ Brandon Stark starting his first year. We used to play this game in Leeds when Neville Longbottom would sip luke-warm cider in the Headingley Taps.
So let’s pretend we’re back in school and look at five lessons we’ve had this week*.
We loved the sweet sweary poetry of this rant/manifesto on branding and advertising agencies producing poor work.
Read and imagine it being spat with a backing beat. Later sections reminded us slightly of Scroobius Pip’s ‘Thou Shalt Always Kill’. You’ll know what we mean when you take a look.
Modern viral meme-making is often like contemporary art: it pretends anyone can do it but that only few people understand it. But this week we all got the new wave of elf on the shelf.
It didn’t matter about getting the cultural reference as long as you had basic photoshop skills and the ability to rhyme two words together.
The best thing about Geography was the annual school trip. Going to a seaside town to learn about coastal erosion was the closest many of us got to being explorers.
Flash forward and now there are people like Jeffrey Tsang producing this incredible 30 Day Time Lapse of a container ship traveling the globe.
Years ago our teachers told us that having another language would be the most helpful thing for our future. Then it turned out everyone abroad compensated for us by speaking English anyway.
But this week has proven that being bilingual is almost like a superpower. We discovered that even if you’ve retained a few phrases of Spanish it can help you avoid talking to Piers Morgan.
There are grand romantic gestures – playing a CD in the snow, filling a room with flowers, chasing after a leaving train – and then there’s a coordinating an Ocean’s 11 style heist film.
This was a case with one Siberian chap who attempted to win his love back by presenting flowers to her window, while sitting in a van held by a crane.
*If your ‘tenuous framing device’ alarm is going off then two things a) it’s definitely working, and b) you should be less of a nerd.